Some of you may be familiar with the song, "Walk it out", some of you may not. Regardless whether or not you know the song, hears the literal meaning of what it means to 'walk it out'.
Honestly, there is alot of buildup and sequence of events that lead up to this story, but I'll do my best to limit my wordiness.
Towards the beginning of the school year Ron, Chandy and I (through answered prayer and divine intervention) were asked if we would like to go to Taft Jr. High during the lunch period to participate in an activity called, "Impact". There are 3 different lunch sessions, one for each of the grades 6th, 7th and 8th. During each session we would go throughout the halls and lunchroom handing out passes to students who wanted free pizza and an opportunity to get out of the stinky lunchroom (no offense lunch ladies). During the mad scramble of kids fighting over pizza we would find a 10 or 15 minute gap for a small message to be delivered and offer prayer over the entire assembly, as well as to any individual wanting some 1v1 time. We were located in the gym during this time primarily because it was a large area and had seating for everyone in the bleachers. Because of our location I was able to meet one of the P.E. teachers, who also coaches the boys basketball team.
After a few weeks of talking to him and learning that he had to organize and select 12 kids from a group of 70 who were trying out I figured I would ask if he needed any help. He did.
Several weeks later, after tryout selections, morning practices and some bumps along the way, we have 9 players(due to grades and failure to attend practice) and are 4-0.
Two weeks ago after a home game one of our players, "Joe", asked me if I could give him a ride home. I gladly agreed. As we walked to my car I asked Joe were he lived. He informed me he lived on the northeast side of town, which seemed unusual because his school, Taft, is located on the northwest side of town. While driving to his house we had a good 20 minutes to chat. Joe was, to my surprise, relatively talkative. He informed me that his foster mom wasn't able to pick him up that night because she had some prior engagement. Which meant he would have to catch a ride home. He went on to tell me how he had been living with his foster mom for about three months now. Prior to living with his foster mom he, his two brothers and his mom lived in an apartment but were being evicted. A few days before he and his family could move into a new house their mom had "bought"(who knows the actual sequence of events and validity of the story)they had to find somewhere else to stay. Joe described their situation by saying that because they don't have any family or relatives in OKC they were "kinda homeless" or "on the streets" for a few days. I guess their family/mom has been in some trouble or has a history with DHS because once their case worker discovered this the kids were immediately taken from her(for good reason, as far as I'm concerned, but that's def. not my call).
Since that time, Joe and his two brothers have been living with their foster mom on the northeast side of town. Before dropping Joe off at his foster moms' house here is what I learned was his typical day.
5:30 - wake up, take a shower and get to bus stop by 6:00
6:00 - endure the city-bus stop and go experience until he arrives at the closest bus stop to Taft around 7:20-7:30 (usually closer to 7:30 because practice starts at 7:30 and he is usually late)
7:30-9:00 - basketball practice
9:00-3:35 - school
3:35-8:00 - on game day, take bus to game, watch girls game and maybe do some homework, play in guys game, then, take bus back to school and figure out a way to get home
I learned all of this two weeks ago. This past Monday we had a game on the southeast side of OKC. The guys' games start at 6 so I leave straight from work at 5 and meet the team at the game. After the game I asked Joe how he was getting home. He didn't seem very worried about it as he told me he was taking the bus. I figured that was a reasonable option as I got in my car. I thought to myself, he's taking the school bus back to school and then the city bus back to his foster mom's house. Or wait, maybe he is taking the school bus back to school and then his foster mom is picking him up at the school...
Turns out, Joe took the school bus back to school and then walked home.
He walked from northwest 23rd and Penn all the way to the northeast side of OKC, that's a couple miles east of I-35. That's a twenty minute drive. He did this at 9:00 at night, which means he probably didn't get home until, around, 10:45 or 11:00. He's in 8th grade.
After hashing out how we address this unbelievable occurrence and how to avoid it happening in the future, coach and I questioned Joe about it. The thing that got me the most about this whole event was that when we talked to Joe about it, he acted like it wasn't a big deal at all. Who knows how many times he has walked that same trip. There are so many things to consider, to question and thoughts that come to mind about this story, but the bottom line is, this shouldn't happen. Coach and I are going to do the best we can to make sure that it doesn't happen again.
Thursday, November 29, 2007
Thursday, November 22, 2007
breaking bread
This past Sunday at our evening worship I was able to take communion with Matt. Paul, who generally gives a thought or talks about a scripture, asked several weeks back that we invite someone each week to take communion with each time we meet. It's a really cool thing to see small children take communion with their mom or dad, a neighborhood kid take communion with a homeless man from the streets or a married couple reflect on the life and sacrifice of Christ.
Matt usually sits towards the back. This night he was in the back on one knee for most of the service. I made eye contact with him and motioned towards the communion area. I prayed a short prayer of thanks and Matt followed it up with a pretty passionate request of forgiveness, thanks for provision and the church (Cross and Crown). Needless to say, it was a pretty awesome experience.
Matt usually sits towards the back. This night he was in the back on one knee for most of the service. I made eye contact with him and motioned towards the communion area. I prayed a short prayer of thanks and Matt followed it up with a pretty passionate request of forgiveness, thanks for provision and the church (Cross and Crown). Needless to say, it was a pretty awesome experience.
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
matt update part II
So, Sunday night I was left pondering what in the world Matt was talking about or what kind of trouble he was about to get himself into. Monday, at the end of the busiest part of the day (11-1:30), I headed over to Rock Island to check out what was for lunch. No luck. Looks like another day of oven pizza, micro waved burrito or leftover food from Sunday night. As I made my way back over the Cross and Crown to see if anyone had any alternate plans I ran into none other than Matt. He looked bad.
After talking to him for several minutes I was finally able to figure out what his big meeting was all about. Just within the past couple hours he had talked to his old girlfriend/employee who he had been running around with back when he was into the business of soliciting women for cash. Matt has a relatively long history with this specific women. Pretty much ever since we have known him, we have known her. They have always been off and on, as far as "dating" goes (if you want to call it dating). One day they were together and everything was great, the next they hated each other and someone was wronging the other person in some fashion. Several months ago this girl he has been running around with for quite some time discovered she was pregnant. No real shock there. Based on the type of lifestyle/job that she has adopted, it really comes as no surprise that she has become pregnant. What did come as somewhat of a surprise was that Matt was/is the father of this child.
So, that's what his meeting was all about. He told this girl that she had to choose. She had to choose between him and the man she was currently with. This isn't the first time Matt has had to confront her with a similar decision, like I said, they were frequently together and apart. Although, because she was now carrying his baby there was some added frustration to her decision to be with the other man. Matt openly talks about just about any and everything he has done or is doing. He told me how he so badly wanted to head down the street, get the 'hook' up from one of his buddies and just shoot up so he didn't have to think about it. It wasn't to hard to inform him of the reality that hours later when it wore off he would still be faced with the some troubles. He agreed, but I still wasn't sure what he would do. He also talked about the possibility of just going and beating down the man his girl was now staying with. Again, no real solution.
After several minutes of discussing options to his predicament I kinda went off on him. I asked him several questions, like, "Why do you think your in this situation?", "How can you make this situation right?", "Is it even possible to make something good come from this?", "What good will come from her(the mother of his supposed child) getting back with you?". He responded by saying that he knows that everything he is in is a result of the life he has chosen or the choices he has made. He mentioned how he wants to be apart of this childs life (apparently this isn't the first time this has happened, but with a different women).
After talking to him a few more minutes we decided the best thing for him to do would be to check on a few jobs that might have work for him. He agreed with me that all he could do was give her an opportunity to be with him and let him be apart of the childs life but it was up to her from there to make her decision. He couldn't make that decision for her. Before I left to go back over to Rock Island we prayed together and asked that God would give him direction, opportunities to do right and the strength and power to choose to do the right thing when those opportunities were presented.
A couple hours later, as I was headed home, Matt was walking towards Cross and Crown, again. He was pretty pumped. He said he made a few calls and had some hours to work. He expressed his gratefulness for the advice and especially the prayer.
Matt isn't a novel or some short story I made up to write on my blog. He isn't some figurative character that came to my mind with fictional scenarios that I made up. This is a real person. This is his real life. Honestly I struggled with whether or not to write everything that I have about Matt. I don't want it to seem like I am exploiting him and his life just for the sake of a interesting blog post. But, I do want people to know about the realness of the people that live in this neighborhood. To alot of people who have never been to Cross and Crown I can understand how it may be easy to read one of these blogs and think, "Ahhh, that's so sad", and then think nothing else of it. So I say this just to clarify, these are real people, just like you and me who struggle with daily temptations, choices and thoughts. So, what I would like you to do is more than just think, "Oh, how sad". Pray for Matt. Pray for his job/work opportunities. Pray that he makes wise choices and decisions.
In the future I will continue to give updates on Matt and his whereabouts, but will probably not get as in depth as I did in these past two blogs.
After talking to him for several minutes I was finally able to figure out what his big meeting was all about. Just within the past couple hours he had talked to his old girlfriend/employee who he had been running around with back when he was into the business of soliciting women for cash. Matt has a relatively long history with this specific women. Pretty much ever since we have known him, we have known her. They have always been off and on, as far as "dating" goes (if you want to call it dating). One day they were together and everything was great, the next they hated each other and someone was wronging the other person in some fashion. Several months ago this girl he has been running around with for quite some time discovered she was pregnant. No real shock there. Based on the type of lifestyle/job that she has adopted, it really comes as no surprise that she has become pregnant. What did come as somewhat of a surprise was that Matt was/is the father of this child.
So, that's what his meeting was all about. He told this girl that she had to choose. She had to choose between him and the man she was currently with. This isn't the first time Matt has had to confront her with a similar decision, like I said, they were frequently together and apart. Although, because she was now carrying his baby there was some added frustration to her decision to be with the other man. Matt openly talks about just about any and everything he has done or is doing. He told me how he so badly wanted to head down the street, get the 'hook' up from one of his buddies and just shoot up so he didn't have to think about it. It wasn't to hard to inform him of the reality that hours later when it wore off he would still be faced with the some troubles. He agreed, but I still wasn't sure what he would do. He also talked about the possibility of just going and beating down the man his girl was now staying with. Again, no real solution.
After several minutes of discussing options to his predicament I kinda went off on him. I asked him several questions, like, "Why do you think your in this situation?", "How can you make this situation right?", "Is it even possible to make something good come from this?", "What good will come from her(the mother of his supposed child) getting back with you?". He responded by saying that he knows that everything he is in is a result of the life he has chosen or the choices he has made. He mentioned how he wants to be apart of this childs life (apparently this isn't the first time this has happened, but with a different women).
After talking to him a few more minutes we decided the best thing for him to do would be to check on a few jobs that might have work for him. He agreed with me that all he could do was give her an opportunity to be with him and let him be apart of the childs life but it was up to her from there to make her decision. He couldn't make that decision for her. Before I left to go back over to Rock Island we prayed together and asked that God would give him direction, opportunities to do right and the strength and power to choose to do the right thing when those opportunities were presented.
A couple hours later, as I was headed home, Matt was walking towards Cross and Crown, again. He was pretty pumped. He said he made a few calls and had some hours to work. He expressed his gratefulness for the advice and especially the prayer.
Matt isn't a novel or some short story I made up to write on my blog. He isn't some figurative character that came to my mind with fictional scenarios that I made up. This is a real person. This is his real life. Honestly I struggled with whether or not to write everything that I have about Matt. I don't want it to seem like I am exploiting him and his life just for the sake of a interesting blog post. But, I do want people to know about the realness of the people that live in this neighborhood. To alot of people who have never been to Cross and Crown I can understand how it may be easy to read one of these blogs and think, "Ahhh, that's so sad", and then think nothing else of it. So I say this just to clarify, these are real people, just like you and me who struggle with daily temptations, choices and thoughts. So, what I would like you to do is more than just think, "Oh, how sad". Pray for Matt. Pray for his job/work opportunities. Pray that he makes wise choices and decisions.
In the future I will continue to give updates on Matt and his whereabouts, but will probably not get as in depth as I did in these past two blogs.
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
update on "Matt"
Over the last month or so I hadn't seen much of Matt. In the back of my mind I kinda assumed that he had fallen off the deep end and was just doing the best he could to avoid us seeing him around. That's how it works with many of the men and women we have been in relationship with in the past that have struggled with some type of addiction or sinful lifestyle. Because of this over the years we have been in and out of relationship with alot of people. I guess that's just human mentality that comes into play when some sin or some harmful behavior that you just can't shake keeps getting the best of you; you don't want to be around others who you think don't struggle with similar things, they might think less of you. Or in alot of cases people wont come back around because they themselves don't feel worthy or what they have done is just too heavy for others to handle.
With this being said, I have seen Matt four times of the last 2 weeks or so. Most recently this past Sunday and yesterday, Monday. The first time I saw Matt was around 2 weeks ago and he looked really good. Physically he looked much different. He had on a nice pair of jeans, a decent looking shirt and a new pair of work boats. His hair was freshly cut (still very long) and he smelled like he had bathed recently (don't get me wrong, I wasn't sniffing all up on him). To summarize, he looked like something was very different. Something was different. Matt had taken a job opportunity in Edmond and was working full time. Matt had/has several ties in the neighborhood and so I was kinda suspicious as to why he was back in the 'hood, when it seemed like he had everything going for him. He told me he was there just to wrap some things up (probably some good and some bad). After talking for only a few minutes (it was a Thursday night so we had 30-40 kids at Rock Island) I told Matt that I was happy for him and that I was happy to see him but really I would be alright if I didn't see him anytime soon. I explained to him that I loved the friendship that we have but in all honesty I would be ok if I never saw him again because that would mean that he was out of the neighborhood, working and back on his feet. As hardcore and street as Matt is and as big as bad.....butt as everyone knows that he is, Matt began to tear up as he thanked me for all the help and advice.
This past Sunday at our evening meal and worship Matt showed up a little late but was still able to grab something to eat. Again, I was surprised to see him and was a little disappointed/upset that he was back in the neighborhood. He didn't look like he did the last time I saw him. He looked like the rougher, street, "im going to pound your face in if you say something I don't like" Matt that I was more familiar with. Like always, I wasn't able to sit down and have a long drawn out talk with Matt but I talked to him long enough to know that he wasn't working in Edmond anymore and he was back in the neighborhood. He told me that something big was going down tomorrow (Monday) and he didn't know yet if it was good or bad. I had no idea what he was talking about doing. He told me he would come by tomorrow and let me know what happened. Yikes. I was just hoping he wouldn't come back the next day and be like, "Luke, I successfully terminated the person that I had a meeting with today." I really had no idea what to expect the next day.
I'm really not doing this on purpose, but its 2:15 and we are starting to get kids for our after school hangout so I will have to finish the rest of my update at a later date.
With this being said, I have seen Matt four times of the last 2 weeks or so. Most recently this past Sunday and yesterday, Monday. The first time I saw Matt was around 2 weeks ago and he looked really good. Physically he looked much different. He had on a nice pair of jeans, a decent looking shirt and a new pair of work boats. His hair was freshly cut (still very long) and he smelled like he had bathed recently (don't get me wrong, I wasn't sniffing all up on him). To summarize, he looked like something was very different. Something was different. Matt had taken a job opportunity in Edmond and was working full time. Matt had/has several ties in the neighborhood and so I was kinda suspicious as to why he was back in the 'hood, when it seemed like he had everything going for him. He told me he was there just to wrap some things up (probably some good and some bad). After talking for only a few minutes (it was a Thursday night so we had 30-40 kids at Rock Island) I told Matt that I was happy for him and that I was happy to see him but really I would be alright if I didn't see him anytime soon. I explained to him that I loved the friendship that we have but in all honesty I would be ok if I never saw him again because that would mean that he was out of the neighborhood, working and back on his feet. As hardcore and street as Matt is and as big as bad.....butt as everyone knows that he is, Matt began to tear up as he thanked me for all the help and advice.
This past Sunday at our evening meal and worship Matt showed up a little late but was still able to grab something to eat. Again, I was surprised to see him and was a little disappointed/upset that he was back in the neighborhood. He didn't look like he did the last time I saw him. He looked like the rougher, street, "im going to pound your face in if you say something I don't like" Matt that I was more familiar with. Like always, I wasn't able to sit down and have a long drawn out talk with Matt but I talked to him long enough to know that he wasn't working in Edmond anymore and he was back in the neighborhood. He told me that something big was going down tomorrow (Monday) and he didn't know yet if it was good or bad. I had no idea what he was talking about doing. He told me he would come by tomorrow and let me know what happened. Yikes. I was just hoping he wouldn't come back the next day and be like, "Luke, I successfully terminated the person that I had a meeting with today." I really had no idea what to expect the next day.
I'm really not doing this on purpose, but its 2:15 and we are starting to get kids for our after school hangout so I will have to finish the rest of my update at a later date.
Saturday, November 10, 2007
get big or go home
During one of our recent youth meetings Ron, Chandy and I discussed how we need to do a better job of approaching the kids health/not so healthy lifestyles. After several minutes of thought we decided that pizza, tacos and lemonade weren't the top three blocks on the food pyramid (weird huh). It occurred to us that although we were providing a safe place for the kids, fun video games to play, a decent meal to eat, some spiritual guidance, and a place where the kids can talk/pray with us, we haven't done much about addressing the wellness of their physical bodies.
In Corinthians we are told to honor God with our bodies by fleeing from sexual immorality. Why shouldn't we also honor God with our bodies by treating it as if it is really what He says it is, the temple of the Holy Spirit. I think maybe Paul knew what he was talking about in Timothy when he said that physical training is of some good. How can you minister to others or give a helping hand to someone struggling with physical illness or physical troubles when you don't even take care of your own body?
Our resolution was that we need to take more seriously what we feed our kids and we need to stress physical activity more then have in the past, which isn't much. Next semester, after Christmas, we have decided to use one of our normal "hang-out" days as a study hall/workout day. Rather then feed pizza and coke and play video games we have allotted this time as homework and workout time. We will have plenty of homework available, but workout options are limited.
We have aspirations of providing the youth with a place to work out upstairs. We hope to have 3-4 cardio machines (treadmill, elliptical, ect.), a small collection of free weights(dumbbells) and a couple of weight machines. So, what we are hoping is that collectively, by way of donated equipment, machines and maybe even specifically allotted financial donations we can provide a place for the kids to improve their physical wellness.
If you have a machine, free weights or some other physically related piece of equipment (that is in decent, usable shape) you would like to donate we would be very pleased to put it to use. If you do donate something to the gym we can probably give you some type of discount or a free gym membership for a couple weeks. We'll work something out for you.
lwhitmire@hotmail.com
or email me for my phone #
In Corinthians we are told to honor God with our bodies by fleeing from sexual immorality. Why shouldn't we also honor God with our bodies by treating it as if it is really what He says it is, the temple of the Holy Spirit. I think maybe Paul knew what he was talking about in Timothy when he said that physical training is of some good. How can you minister to others or give a helping hand to someone struggling with physical illness or physical troubles when you don't even take care of your own body?
Our resolution was that we need to take more seriously what we feed our kids and we need to stress physical activity more then have in the past, which isn't much. Next semester, after Christmas, we have decided to use one of our normal "hang-out" days as a study hall/workout day. Rather then feed pizza and coke and play video games we have allotted this time as homework and workout time. We will have plenty of homework available, but workout options are limited.
We have aspirations of providing the youth with a place to work out upstairs. We hope to have 3-4 cardio machines (treadmill, elliptical, ect.), a small collection of free weights(dumbbells) and a couple of weight machines. So, what we are hoping is that collectively, by way of donated equipment, machines and maybe even specifically allotted financial donations we can provide a place for the kids to improve their physical wellness.
If you have a machine, free weights or some other physically related piece of equipment (that is in decent, usable shape) you would like to donate we would be very pleased to put it to use. If you do donate something to the gym we can probably give you some type of discount or a free gym membership for a couple weeks. We'll work something out for you.
lwhitmire@hotmail.com
or email me for my phone #
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